new raspberry; �HATES technological I am sick to death of erectile dysfunction, pass the tampons please |
AA Speaker 2 I started drinking I started drinking & smoking pot my 13th summer, which was spent away from home. I was a live-in babysitter for a couple in Lake Tahoe and I went hog wild with my first taste of freedom. I had an �Older Boyfriend� and very little supervision. Because my boyfriend was old enough to drink, everyone assumed his girl was too so I had no trouble being served wherever we went. The kids I was sitting were ten and two. They probably didn�t get watched as well as they deserved that summer, but no one was seriously injured or died on my watch so I considered it a success. At 14 I looked old for my age, but I never realized how much until some kids I didn�t know came up to me outside a liquor store and asked me to buy them some beer. I was on my way in to buy a pack of smokes so I grabbed whatever it was that I liked to drink at the time, the beer they wanted and asked the clerk for my Marlboro Reds. The clerk didn�t bat an eye and neither did I. It was just too easy. I spent the next couple of years running away from home, hanging around bars getting drunk or stoned and stealing the cars of drunk guys. I crashed with friends or lived on the street or slept with some guy so I wouldn�t have to spend the night in the park. I bounced in and out of the juvenile justice system but no one could figure out what to do with me. No one ever wanted to press charges when I stole a car because they didn�t want to explain to their wife or their girlfriend or their buddies how this little bitty girl got the best of them. My parents couldn�t control me so they�d let me stew in juvy. Until the cops said they HAD to come get me, they couldn�t legally hold me there anymore. In juvy all there is to do is eat and sleep so I�d pack on the pounds when I was there and lose it again when I got back on the street. I still yo-yo my weight, but it�s a lot harder to lose it at 45 than it was at 14. In the 70�s it was popular for parents with really good health insurance to park their uncontrollable children in mental hospitals and at the age of 16 I did a nine month stretch in one. Some of the kids there really did need to be there, but most of us were simply suffering from �wild child� syndrome. All we really needed were some boundaries, someone to say no and make it stick. I used my time there to catch up on all the school I�d missed. I completed two years of high school in that nine months and it was the first smart thing I�d done in a long time. In retrospect, I probably should have also used all the shrinks and therapists the insurance was paying for to get my head on straight and develop some tools to deal with my home life sanely, but I did not appreciate the opportunity that was right there before me. I just wanted out. So I played the guilt card. I told my mom that if she didn�t get me out, I�d kill myself. It worked, I got out. About the time I was hitting 17, one of the juvenile detectives that I knew so well took me aside and told me that I�d better get my shit together before I turned 18 because when that happened, my free ride was going to be over and it was no more cushy private cells in juvenile hall for me, I�d go to jail with the big girls and I probably wouldn�t like that too much. He was kind enough to take me on a tour of Sybil Brand Institute which is the big women�s jail in Los Angeles. What an eye opener! He said if I played my cards right, I could get emancipated from my parents and I wouldn�t have to put up with their drunken bullshit anymore. I passed a high school equivalency exam, got a job, got an apartment with some friends and proceeded to party as much as humanly possible. There was this guy we hung with who really liked me and I kinda liked him, but I really loved the fact that he had his own house because I was getting sick of sharing an apartment with a bunch of slobs so we hooked up and I moved in with him. And then the party really started. Part 2 of 6
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secrets pondering: Why the right wingers who want to keep the government out of their business insist on putting the government in my bedroom laughing about: It gets lost in translation crying about: bad habits: smoking totally ballistic about: amen sister: someone else�s take on childlessness regular reads: cactustree must see tv: |