new raspberry; �HATES technological I am sick to death of erectile dysfunction, pass the tampons please |
Torture Anyone? Torture Anyone? So you've heard me mention my awful teeth, right? I haven't? Well, once upon a time as a teenager I had orthodontics to convert my mouth to something worthy of a billboard on Sunset Boulevard (OK, maybe only Ventura Boulevard). Prior to that I could have eaten corn on the cob through a picket fence. Typical over-achiever, I rushed my treatment by wearing my head-gear 24/7 from day one so that I could get rid of it in five months rather than 18 months. I got the rest of the braces removed fully one year ahead of schedule. Then I proceeded to neglect the hell out of my dental health. I lost my retainer pretty damn quick. I was an evil child and there was not going to be any replacement for it forthcoming from my parents and I can't say I blame them. I was not an easy teenager to raise; hell, I was barely ever home. Years of drugs, smoking, alcohol and total disregard of dental hygiene have left me with a mess of smile, more crooked than before my teenage orthodontia. I take full responsibility for the wreckage that is my smile. There is no one to blame but myself. Now I have to admit that what I see of me in the mirror is not what you see when you are sitting across from me having a conversation. I don't know if I subliminally edit out how truly bad my teeth look or what. I just know that when I see pictures of me smiling, I am horrified by how very bad my teeth actually look. But I'm also terrified of the pain that is going to be caused in correcting this mess. Thursday the pain began. They extracted five teeth. In the six months it will take my gums to heal, I have a temporary partial so that I don't have to gum my way through life (although Ms., aka my Better half, might like that quite nicely if you get my drift), or worse�remain mute for six months out of embarrassment at my lack of pearly off-whites. If you think for some reason that you would like to see the horrifying, gory pictures of the process, let me know for I am documenting the entire procedure and would be happy to share it. Listening to: keys clicking on the keyboard Smelling: cinnamon coffee Reading: william least heat~moon prairyerth Mood: high on narcotics
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