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I was born in Hollywood, California.
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I have an IQ score that is disgustingly underutilized.
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My parents gave me a short first name�not the name I
currently use�to counter a long and un-pronounceable surname.
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My middle name of Arleen is from my paternal grandmother.
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I adopted my current first name when I applied for my
social security card in high school.
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I�ve recently wished I could revert to my birth name.
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I was bald at birth. They called me �Ike� after President
Eisenhower.
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I made up for it by sprouting the most gorgeous naturally
curly hair, also compliments of my paternal grandmother.
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I spent my first years in some sort of metal brace
contraption to correct a hip socket defect.
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My brother had surgery in his early teens to correct a
similar defect.
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I left my lifelong home of Los Angeles at the age of 43
to live in a small town in Kansas.
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I love living in a small town.
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I miss hanging out in West Hollywood.
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I could go all day without seeing another person and not
feel lonely.
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There are fewer things/people I miss in California than I
thought there would be.
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I would die for my dogs.
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I have a cat that thinks he�s a dog and two cats that
know they are cats.
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I dislike cicadas.
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I dislike most bugs for that matter.
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I get excited when I see a blue heron fishing in my pond.
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I love the sound of honking geese as they fly overhead.
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I�m glad they don�t like my pond as I can�t stand geese
poop.
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I liked deer until I found out they eat roses.
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I despise squirrels�they�ve chewed both my phone line and
my power line in half.
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I got a squirrel gun for Christmas this year.
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And I know how to use it�look out squirrels.
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I kill moles via hand-to-hand combat.
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I love a violent thunderstorm.
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I used to be terrified of thunderstorms but I had to get
over that when I moved to Kansas.
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I once closed my eyes driving across Utah because of a
thunderstorm. My friend Sousan insisted I open my eyes or she would kill me. You heard me right; I was driving with my eyes closed.
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I�ve lived alone, by myself, for one year of my entire
life.
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It wasn�t long enough.
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I thought I was a republican, but a survey I just took
says I�m a democrat. Shit. What do I do now?
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The older I get, the more narrow-minded I become.
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I was raised Catholic, but no longer practice an
organized religion because most organized religions would burn me at the
stake.
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That�s ok, I believe Jesus loves me. His dad too.
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I cried at a Barbra Striesand concert. Not because it was
good, but because my seat was so high in the stands I was afraid I was going
to fall, all the way down to the floor of Arrowhead Pond, and break my neck. I
got club seats for my next visit to Arrowhead Pond to see the Ducks.
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I split my own wood with an 8-pound maul.
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I own my own chainsaw. Table saw too.
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I paid for a subscription to have half my favorite comics
emailed to me every day. I�m not ready to pay to have the other half emailed
from �the other� syndicate so I read them online.
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I am addicted to my Outlook To-Do list. I wouldn�t get
anything done without it.
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When I look in the mirror, I see a younger me.
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I�m an instant asshole�just add alcohol so I quit
drinking. Go Bill W.
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I quit smoking because my mother got lung cancer. Dateline 7/2004: Didn't work, I'm using the excuse of intolerable stress to go back on the fags...
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I missed the cigarettes more than the booze.
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I miss cocaine most of all. A trip to the ER made me quit that one before I
could get addicted.
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I love to read, especially when I can read a book
straight through.
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My favorite author used to be Stephen King but he�s lost
it since the accident.
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I go to a writer�s retreat each September. Each time I
get braver with sharing my writings.
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I will take pictures of anything�even road kill.
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In the winter I like the heat set at 74.
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In the summer I like the cool set at 70.
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My partner and I are temperature incompatible.
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I am a lesbian, despite being married to a man for many
years.
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I am divorced.
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I kept my husband�s surname when we divorced.
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I am in a committed, monogamous relationship with a woman
I adore.
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I don�t believe humans are meant to be monogamous, but I
respect my partner enough to honor her belief in it.
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I am not a mother, but I am a stay-at-home parent.
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I miss my income, but not my job.
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I resent being financially dependent upon my partner
since I think she is sometimes more �cheap� than �frugal.�
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I realize she has our best interests for our retirement
years in mind when she is being �cheap.�
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I hate my mother-in-law. When next we meet, it is my
desire to be shoveling dirt on her coffin. Sorry if that sounds uncharitable
but she made it her mission to destroy a very happy family so I pray there is
a special place for her�in hell.
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I am an only child due to the demise of my brother in
1981 at the age of fifteen. His death shattered an already fractured family.
We�re only just now re-connecting.
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My favorite coffee is Chocolate Raspberry.
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I mix cranraspberry juice with diet coke.
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I can�t believe I survived my teens; I was very reckless
and lived dangerously�
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I was arrested several times as a teenager for grand
theft auto. I was never charged, and always eventually released.
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The police stopped cruising on Van Nuys Blvd. before I
got my driver�s license.
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I once ran away to escape the wrath of my father over a
bad report card. Two states away wasn�t far enough�
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I don�t currently own my own vehicle.
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I�m a compulsive house cleaner, but I�m getting better
about letting things slide. If only my family would pick up after themselves.
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I believe that when things cost more, they are generally
of a better quality than something less expensive.
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But I will still shop at Walmart every chance I get.
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I love to shop on the Internet.
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Heck, I love to shop anywhere. I�m a shop-a-holic.
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I played clarinet in the band in school. A bottle of
vodka fit perfectly inside our band hats.
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I tried out for drill team but ended up getting stoned
for the final try-out and blowing it.
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I slept through 11th grade history and got an
AUU.
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I was smarter than my teachers, with the exception of Ms.
Haley, my 10th grade English teacher.
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I finished high school via the CHSPE.
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I did not exit college with a degree.
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I am a few credits short of an AA in criminal justice.
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I took a bunch of criminal justice classes to keep my
student status active while I was waiting for space to be available in the
computer classes I wanted to take.
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I would make a lousy cop.
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I�ve lost a good portion of my personal possessions to
earthquakes twice in my life.
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I�ll take a ten-minute tornado warning over no earthquake
warning any day.
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I am compulsive about watching the weather forecast on
the local news since we moved to Kansas. Weather was a joke in California,
life or death here in Kansas.
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I like having 4 seasons.
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I miss the beach.
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I miss the impossibly steep mountains in So Cal.
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I love playing roulette in Las Vegas. I don�t go there
often enough.
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I agree with the person who said writing all these �I�
and �Me� statements is hard.
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I am an emotionally distant person�I think the result of
being raised by undependable alcoholics�and prefer to keep my own counsel.
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I am a perfectionist.
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I see things as more black and white, than shades of
gray.
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AA hasn�t made it any easier to admit it when I am wrong.
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I�ve never been happy with my weight, even when it was
perfect.
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I�m not a huge TV watcher, but I hate to miss Judging
Amy, ER and Providence.
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I never wanted to visit Italy before I watched the movie
Under the Tuscan Sun.
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I would like to visit each state in the United States of
America.